Family time...

Feeling a little lonely today. My sister Pip and her boyfriend left last night after spending a week here with Milo and me.  We loved having them here, especially as I'm so close to Pip, she just 'gets' me. And Milo was so happy having two people who adore him nearly as much as I do. It was also lovely having daily conversations spoken in English!

We did a fair bit of exploring, I also took them to all my favourite coffee stops. I even drove them to the market but silly satnav lady took us via a mountain and a farmers field. Best bit was spending a day on the beach like a proper holiday maker, sadly Milo is not allowed on the big beach. We even got in a tour of Lisbon city before their flight. Unfortunately I fell over twice, once over a small bollard whilst turning back to talk to them and then again whilst stepping (or forgetting to) through a doorway in a garage door.

I think they both enjoyed their stay at the big beach house. They both were so helpful in the preparations for the big wedding in three weeks. Casa Branca is so aptly named, we never want to see a tin of white paint again! I loved seeing them together as a loving couple. They were childhood sweethearts and reunited after over thirty years through Facebook. They are so happy together it gives me a renewed hope that I too could have that one day :)

I'm now starting to think about winter. My dream would be to find a house sit in a rural UK location and write my memoirs!...

Love my sis Pip...

Happy days...

Sisters... 

Lisbon and my new hat (thank you mummy)... 

 Yeay The Mouse... 

Fun in the sun... 

Milo and Me... Will we ever be three...

When I look back it amazes me how much has happened to me in just over a year. It mainly feels quite surreal. If someone had said to me 'this is going to happen as you approach fifty' I would have said "Hell yeah!"

I'm no different to anyone else who wishes they were in a loving and secure relationship. My dreams and ambitions are not out of the ordinary. Perhaps it's just the way I went about it that sets me aside...

In short: I left a full time job, I left my home of sixteen years, I sold practically everything I owned, I bought a motorhome, I started writing a blog, I travelled around Scotland, I made new friends, I lost old friends, I enjoyed a relationship, I lost a relationship, I travelled to Southern America, I moved into my mums back garden, I travelled around Ireland, I arrived in Portugal, I had my life documented through worldwide media. I'm having an amazing adventure at a time in my life I assumed would have been complete. Sometimes this feels like just the beginning.

 And all this happened with Milo, my best friend, by my side. I looked for love, I'm still looking for love, and yet I've had love by my side the whole time...

Met this little fella four years ago...

Always by my side MiloandMe...

Chatting up dead men...

Milo and me are getting quite excited as my sister Pip and her boyfriend are coming to visit us in Portugal next Monday.  Ali has a list of jobs for them to do for her in preparation for the forthcoming wedding at the big beach house (about five weeks away!) but I'm sure we'll still find time to have some fun. And I know Milo is going to be uber excited to see them.

I had a practice run to the airport today with hunky friend. We went to pick up his equally hunky friend who is visiting. I love airports but unfortunately we spent our time waiting in a petrol station so as to avoid extortionate parking charges. Makes me laugh here how people wander around the forecourt of petrol stations randomly smoking away. In the UK even if you use your mobile phone in a garage people think it will blow the place up. Anyway the airport run went without a hitch so fingers crossed I'll find it on my own when I go to pick up Pip and not end up in the Algarve. Or my illusive Thai prison!

We went to a garden centre at the weekend looking for a fountain, Ali ended up buying a selection of Buddahs which someone has now pointed out that they look like dead babies!
Me and Milo are still loving our daily walks on the beach, as yet still to find a handsome stranger. Although I did park up the Mouse this morning and noticed a man lying in the bushes in front of me. I did think he was possibly dead and upon closer inspection he may as well have been. The search goes on...

Me doing my Buddah impression...

Baby Buddahs...

Difficult to spot me here...

Dead man... 

Ab Fab Gran...

Ali found her boom box yesterday morning so we had some fab tunes blasting through the big beach house. As we have no paying guests just now this was all fine and even Gran seemed to enjoy as I jiggled  her up and down on her vibrating mattress. We plugged the tunes into the car stereo on our way to the market where I spotted, on route, the location of my recent 'drugs run'. At which point the stereo was blasting out a background noise of a police car siren and I automatically threw myself into the footwell under the seat! In my head shouting 'hit the gas Ali'.

Sometimes I think poor Gran, she must feel like she is living with Patsy and Edina from the Absolutely Fabulous sitcom. One night when we were lifting her from the wheelchair to her bed Ali grabbed Grans legs to lift onto the bed but grabbed one of mine too, I didn't even realise until I was practically in bed with her! The other day, down the corridor, I was walking behind Ali pushing Gran in the wheelchair when her trousers fell down to her ankles, she just kept walking, albeit wonky and providing me with a right eyeful!

Sometimes when the three of us are just chilling with Netflix Gran does her 'dead' impression. This involves Gran just staring into space and holding her breath for the longest time. Freaks me and Ali out every time! On other occasions Gran does her 'exorcist' impression when she lets out a very loud and long gargled noise from deep within. That one freaks us out even more. Once when in a shopping mall my bestie friend, Sue, told me that the wheelchair wheels can grip the moving escalator floor going downhill. No they can't! The shopping trolleys can. Nearly lost Gran that day!

Gran is an absolute trooper for 90 years of age. Nobody knows her view of the world she lives in but I like to think she's having an 'absolutely fabulous' giggle with me and Ali...

Gran 90 years young...

Milo guarding Gran...

Gossiping with Gran...

Tall dark handsome naked guests...

For some reason the beginning of my blog disappeared from public view. I'm rubbish with technology but am a little bit impressed with myself that after months of trying I have sort of reinstated the beginning of my blog. I've managed to create a page of 'all blog' although the text is so pale it's practically invisible and you have to click into July to access June and May! But for me this is a techno breakthrough :) If anyone reading this knows better I'm open to help.

I've managed to shake off my Stavros admirer and now the only recent attention I've received has come via a sex shop asking me to help promote and fund their latest vibrator. Oh and I'm still receiving follows from 'sexy' girls on Twitter. I did happen to see the other day a little mate for the Mouse. I didn't think there existed a smaller vehicle than the Mouse, but there is. They would make a lovely couple.

Last night I met some of our new paying guests. Unfortunately they were in their bathroom getting dressed at the time! Earlier in the day the key to their door wouldn't work so during the evening I took the handyman upstairs (oooh lala!) having thought the guests were out for the evening, and just barged into their room to be confronted with quite an eyeful. But, in my devious mind, I'm storing this 'broken door' excuse for any tall, dark, handsome potential paying guests that may visit...

Who needs who...

Mate for Mouse...

My Mouse...

Chatted up by Stavros...

I've been 'laying low' since my drugs run. Especially as I've since found out the Mouse only has one headlight. I was lucky I wasn't pulled over with me saying 'oh I'm just holding this little package for my friend'. (Sounds quite rude that... Sorry friend!).

I did go out during the day on Wednesday. Took myself on a little road trip to Caldas Da Rainha. I parked the Mouse in a little back street and did my 'Hanzel and Gretel' trick by photographing various things to follow to find my way back. Guess which photo jogged my memory? Hmmm yes.  I spent most of the day sitting in cafes people watching, one of my favourite hobbies. Did the same yesterday, went to Coimbra and spent my day in the old town sat at pavement cafes. I did at one point think the street entertainer was a bit weird, until I realised he was just a wanna be punk high on something and not actually dancing for the crowd. The policeman seemed to calm him down somewhat.

This morning, whilst walking Milo at the lagoon I was approached and chatted up by a man. Sadly not my tall dark handsome knight in shining armour I've so often dreamed about. No, more of a Stavros lookalike wearing a wife beater vest, cap on backward sporting some multi coloured shades and originating from Wrexham of all places. He offered to walk me home, which I managed to decline, and would love to meet up the same time tomorrow. Unfortunately Milo, tomorrow's walk will be much later in the day than normal...

Yes...

Callas De Rainha...

Miami Vice and the Mouse...

I had a rather unusual Saturday night. Based on my naivety it appears I went on a 'drugs run'. I was out with friends when I was asked if I could drive a friend of a friend to the next town to pick something up. 'Oh yes that's no problem I have the mouse'.
So the gentleman hops into the mouse and off we drive. It was quite late and dark and my vision was blurred by the sea mist and lack of water for my wipers. Along the way he made various phone calls, none of which I understood, then asked me to pull into a petrol station. We went into the petrol station, bought drinks and sat back in the car. While we're sitting there blasting out some rather good 80's tunes  I ask who are we waiting for and am informed he is not sure as it is a new supplier. This is when I realise I am on a 'drugs run'.
Well I'm quite disappointed we are in a well lit, busy petrol station and not down a dark alley behind a wheelie bin wearing some form of disguise. As if to humour me the petrol station then closes shutting off all lights. So there we are sitting in the mouse on a dark forecourt waiting for the 'drug pusher'.
What if it's a set up, what if they're onto us, what if that lady closing up the shop is undercover Miami Vice? Or what if the new drug pusher don't like the look of us, or just mugs us, or even has a gun? My imagination went into overdrive and my future consisted of spending the next twenty years in a Thai prison at best, or shot dead in the mouse.
Whilst all these thoughts are running through my head a big motorbike pulled up next to my open window. I didn't know whether to put my hands up or put my foot down. Anyway the rider mumbled in a foreign language and put something in my hand. My friend had in the meantime got out the car and I'm left sitting there with 'the goods'. When he got back in the mouse I threw them at him like a hot potato, revved the engine and drove like a bat out of hell convinced we were being tailed...

Just for the record and to protect all identities (mainly me!) I know no names and saw no faces...

Me...

Men in speedos is not a good look...

Living in Portugal... I'm getting used to the fact that my steering wheel hasn't been stolen, and am learning to enter the car from the left. I'm discovering that flies don't just land on shit, they like me too. A lot. I'm accepting the fact that walking barefoot on sand every day doesn't make my feet baby soft, more like as rough as a badgers arse! I've learnt that I actually miss rain, like real heavy wet rain that warrants a big hot chocolate after the fact. I've succumbed to the 'another beer?' Oh why not the sun is shining. Hence pot belly bikini girl. I'm forgiving all the people I meet on my walks for not saying hello to me and Milo, it's just not what they do here. But I'll keep on saying hello. I'm enjoying off loading all my inner thoughts on Gran knowing she'll never tell a soul. Portugal is mainly all good for MiloandMe.

I don't know if organising a wedding is the same worldwide but Ali is organising her daughters wedding to be held in the big beach house in October and my word it's stressful. Kind of puts me off finding the man of my dreams, or at least calls for an elopement should the occasion arise. On that front there really isn't much action. As per usual I'm being extremely fussy and holding out for Mr Perfect. We have some more paying guests in the big beach house and it transpired one gentleman was single. I got quite excited until I spied him heading to the pool in his speedos. Not a sight for the faint hearted. I went to the local Festa last week but it seemed to be full of teenagers and aged DJ's. I tried the local Circus too thinking I might meet an exciting lion tamer, but the show was cancelled due to lack of visitors. So I'm back to trawling the beach in search of a sexy fisherman. Which isnt proving easy as Milo still insists on eating their catches from the buckets they leave on the shore...

Telling Gran my secrets...

Sexy DJ...

No lion tamers here... 

I'm so special...

So I'm sitting in a cafe minding my own business drinking my coffee. I start to notice that everyone is  looking at me, like really looking at me. I did happen to wash and blow dry my hair and had even worn a touch of mascara so I'm beginning to think I'm looking a little bit extra special today. That is until I stood up to leave and realise I am sitting right in front of the 'specials board' !
Later in the day I stopped for a small beer in a local bar. I checked in on Facebook and immediately got a 'like' from the dishy barman standing behind me. I thanked him on leaving, we made friends on Facebook and he promised me tapas on my return. I left the bar, once again feeling a little extra special, aware he was maybe watching me walk to my car, so I did my oh so confident 'flick the hair walk' then got into the Mouse on the wrong side!

I took the Mouse for a car wash the other day mainly to remove half the beach from it. I also now know why a beach bag is so called (see photo!). I mainly cleaned the Mouse as Mr Hunky was returning from his business trip and as he so kindly lent me the Mouse I wanted him to see what great care I was taking of it. Don't think he was that bothered about Mouses well being though, as we went to the local Festa, behaved like teenagers, and drove back at about 3 in the morning with Mr Hunky thinking it would be fun to wrap his hands over my eyes whilst I drove down the road. It most likely improved my driving!

Fantastic news on Milo and Max's friendship. They actually curled up on the couch together the other night and slept for about an hour. They still fight like big brother little brother most days but practically spooning on the couch is a big step forward...

Washing the Mouse...

Beach bag...

Best friends... 

A year on from Mr P...

Received a lovely call from Mr P today. He informed me it is a year to the day that I bounced out of the Beast and into his arms. We do keep in regular contact and he is seemingly doing really well. It's funny how when we break up with someone we want them to be absolutely ok about it, and then when we realise they are it's like 'how dare he/she get over me!' Mr P is selling the Big House and moving on. I have many happy memories (and some hilarious/sad ones) of the Big House, and Mr P. He probably helped carve my future and I hope I did his too, in a good way. I know I'll never meet another Mr P...

Milo is struggling with the heat today. Not helped by the fact that we had lunch on the terrace and he sat right next to me in the sun waiting for my scraps. We kind of snook outside today as the PG's have gone sightseeing and we have spent most of the weekend hiding in the basement with the dogs. (The unseen staff). Today we are rebuilding hoovers. For some reason Ali has five and only one seems to work. So good old YouTube Google is being viewed. If it cools down later me and Ali may pop out in The Mouse to the beach with the dogs. I still absolutely love dotting about in the Mouse, it's so cute.

Yesterday when out walking Milo we had a coffee stop. I chose a familiar local beach front venue and sat back to relax and enjoy my extremely cheap brew. I obviously relaxed a little too much as Milo spotted something (not sure what) and made a run for it. I unfortunately had hold of his lead and actually went with him, chair attached to my sweaty backside. I had the good sense to release the lead  once I was flat on the floor, chair still attached to backside, and a very kind old man caught Milo and helped me up. I said very little, other than my basic 'obrigado' so as not to be known as 'that ditzy English woman on the beach...'



Memories...

Me and Ali on the beach...

The five hoovers... 

My cute Mouse... 

Left on the shelf with a wooden penis...

Can't believe I've been here in Portugal for over a month now. Sometimes it feels like a week other times like years. The big beach house is to welcome PG's on Saturday (paying guests). So this week has been a blur of final preparations upstairs for them. I've felt a bit useless all week as Ali seems to thrive in the organised chaos of the big beach house, I seem to be dumbstruck by it all and never quite know where to begin. The PG's  are apparently a large family of about ten and have rented all of upstairs for a week. The difficult bit will be informing Milo and Max they are neither the enemy nor new best friends. It may be a bit like that tv show 'upstairs downstairs' with me and Ali hiding in hallways and having sneaky dips in the pool when they go out. Anyway fingers crossed it all goes well, though I have a feeling they may be a tad demanding.

Through clearing all the clutter I have been presented with two items of interest. One a sex manual and the other a wooden penis shaped bottle opener. Apparently Caldas da Rainha has been making penis shaped items for over 150 years and is very famous for it. So I cracked open a bottle of beer and sat down to read the book. Unfortunately the book was for couples only so I've left it on the shelf, which is exactly how I'm feeling...

No descriptions needed...

Hot girls...

For some strange reason I seem to have quite a few followers on Twitter of scantily clad young girls. I have no idea why they seem to want to follow me, a middle aged, homeless, crazy woman, but they do! I even have trouble trying to figure out their profile pictures, you know the type when it's a certain part of the body in close up but on first appearance it could be a kitchen utensil or the like! Then when you properly view it it's like 'oh my word' haha. Last year it was wannabe young male Canadian pop stars. I think it's down to one followed by mistake and the others joined in. No doubt any hot blooded males reading this will now be logging onto my Twitter account (nicci66nicci enjoy!).

I went to the market again yesterday, this time without Milo. But I very nearly came back with a new puppy. It was in a tiny cage full of shredded newspaper and just whimpering in the heat. The sign said 'Labrador 100 euro' seemed a bit cheap to me for a Labrador. I resisted the puppy purchase and bought some slippers instead. Ali went to the Algarve again this week and came back with the most gorgeous pair of sparkly flip flops for me, much nicer than the pair Max ate. They are far too nice to wear down at the lagoon, which is extra muddy just now as it seems as though someone has pulled the plug out! The water is really low and sludgy but Milo doesn't seem to mind.

We went for another drive in the Mouse this morning but I got a little lost again. I ended up going through the village twice, on one occasion driving on the wrong side of the road. I actually couldn't figure out 'why is that man is driving straight at me?' I drove to the shops and parked up but didn't have the heart to leave Milo or the Mouse in that heat, so got back in and drove home...

Hot girl...

How much is that doggy...

Sparkly flip flops... 

Milo in the Lagoon...

Milo in the Mouse... 

My totally useless gaydar...

Milo and Me went exploring in the Mouse today. And yes we did get lost. I had a plan to travel to the opposite side of the lagoon. It seemed a pretty straight forward destination, follow the edge of the lagoon. Trouble was I lost sight of the lagoon at one point and totally lost my bearings. Ended up miles away from the lagoon in a tiny village with roads barely wide enough for the Mouse. I was rather impressed though that I found my way home. We stopped on route for a coffee and two rather handsome men sat at the table in front of me. I was that busy thinking of a way to get them to notice me that I didn't notice Milo had his head in my handbag and was munching through a pack of baby wipes. Anyway they soon left and I swear they were holding hands. My gaydar is rubbish.

We stopped on a beach for a splash about and Milo was devastated when I started munching on what looked like a hamburger but was infact stuffed with chocolate. I, obviously, was far from devastated. I love driving the Mouse, it's like a really fast dodgem car. I saw another one yesterday that was bright pink, I might ask hunky friend to respray Mouse!

I think I may love the housekeeper as much as Milo now. Not because she worries 'the little girl needs feeding' but I love the way she launders my clothes. She washes, dries and irons everything and presents it back to me like it just came off a shop shelf. I also love that when I was parking the Mouse today a car pulled up beside me and the lady said hello. I now know local people like I'm a 'local'...

My gay friends...

My chocolate hamburger...

My laundry... 

From Beast to Mouse...

Yeay Milo and Me have got ourselves a set of wheels. We've gone from the Beast to the Mouse. I am now driving a Smart car! Ali's rather hunky friend happened to have a spare car he wasn't using and said I can drive it for the foreseeable future. It is so cute and as soon as I started the engine Milo jumped on the back shelf like he was in the Beast. Although we only drove to the bottom of the drive and back. And even that took all morning as for some reason we couldn't release the handbrake. Ali and I tried everything even googling for answers. Eventually somehow Ali managed to release it. So hopefully Milo and Me can go off exploring this beautiful area in the 'Mouse'.  Luckily I packed my satnav.

I'm having problems with flip flops. The old pair I brought with me were quickly wearing out what with walking on the beach every day. So I bought myself a pretty little new pair at the market. Not sure I got the right size as on numerous occasions I've tripped on my 'flip'. Also Milo walks so closely behind me he constantly stands on my 'flop'. Then to top it all I woke up this morning to find Max had eaten my 'flop' on one flip flop! First shopping trip in the Mouse is to buy new flip flops.

Ali took me to a local restaurant the other night and got me rather tipsy on Caipirosca cocktails. They are a delicious mix of vodka and limes and brown sugar, I think. Anyway I slept well that night.
I think my last blog entry made some people think I'm not happy. Just to set the record straight I'm tickityboo! Even though I'm living what I consider a wonderful life I still have down days. I'm beginning to realise I am and always will be a bit of a misfit in this world (as opposed to that other world?!...)

The Mouse...

The flip flops...

Getting tipsy...