Released without charge...

I've had a week of birthday celebrations, mainly consisting of beverages. Pip and I found a local pub, the Shippons in Irby, that offer free Baileys with the purchase of coffee. This week alone we've visited it four times! And then on my birthday we sat in the garden all day drinking jugs of Pimms.
I've had a lovely birthday week with family and friends, quite different to last year. I was in Ireland, just Milo and me, in the Beast with lots of chocolate. None the less a good birthday.

I actually now feel like I've gone back in time because I'm trying out contact lenses. It's weird doing everyday activities without having to reach for my glasses, I love it. Just a pity they're so darn expensive. This morning, as a cost saving activity, I've made a big pan of soup. It's made from all the left over vegetable peelings I would normally have binned, but have been storing up in a freezer bag. To be honest it looks disgusting and stinks but I'm convincing myself it is going to be delicious.

Yesterday was interesting. I ended up in the back of a police car! I only stopped to say hello and the police officer decided, after listening to my tale of the past two years, that I was one crazy lady! I was released, pending further investigation, without charges...

Countdown for rust2rome trip is now days, not weeks. I'm swaying between excitement and fear. Excitement of travelling once again and fear of the Unknown. The team car 'Range Pig' now has stickers bearing my name on the door. Hopefully Interpol don't hold my details haha...

Arresting behaviour...

Stinky soup...

I'm a co pilot... 

I need a dating handbook...

I really need to get a grip when it comes to men. I'm so long out of the game I need a handbook.
In the past two weeks I've attended two funerals, a wedding party and a rugby event. At the rugby event I was helping serve a hog roast. My job of the day entailed asking every customer 'would you like stuffing sir?' And I still didn't get a date! I think the only single man at the first funeral was the vicar and the second funeral, for some reason, had me pole dancing in the marque!  I was even less successful at the wedding party.
"Can I get you a drink?" He asked me
"Are you chatting me up?" I enquired
"No, I'm the barman..." He answered

I got to catch up with my bestie Sue in Scotland at the second funeral. Her dear Granny had passed away and the family gave her a lovely send off. My bestie Ali from Portugal flew over too, it was so nice to see all the family together, it's just a shame it's a funeral that brings us together.
I even got to visit Blair Atholl Palace, which I'd never visited before even though it was on my doorstep when I lived up there. Sadly there was no Prince Charming in the palace but the vodka made up for that.

I'm so excited that in less than two weeks I will be on my rust2rome adventure. Two weeks today I will be somewhere but I don't know where. I love that. The car 'team Range Pig' is all stickered up ready for the road and my Shewee sticker is sitting proud on the bonnet! Just hope I don't spot the man of my dreams whilst mid flow in a bush...

Pole dancing at a funeral...

No Prince Charming in the palace...

Team Range Pig... 

I feel like a man...

My Shewee arrived in the post this weekend. It's a lovely bright pink one, not the most discreet colour choice, but when needs must I won't care what colour it is. I've had a little practice and now I know how you men feel! I might even visit my son and piddle all over his toilet seat mwhaha.

This week I also got my annual hair cut. It was that or grow my arms longer, I was having trouble reaching the ends its got so long. I'm now in the process of practice packing for my rust2rome trip, can't believe I leave in less than three weeks. I'm uber excited, I think the departure from Scotland will be awesome with over 40 cars all stickered up and revving at the start line. After that I get the feeling the trip is going to be one long hangover! Our car number is 21, nice matches my age! Seems my co-drivers are nearly as crazy as me so I'm sure we'll all get on famously. I'm also depending on them to act as my wing men and find me a potential Italian/Swiss/French/Scottish/English husband enroute.

Milo is still being a little star of late. He had a little practice run of me being away as I went to London for a couple of days last week (exciting adventure unfortunately I have to keep it secret for now). The rest of my 'exciting' life has involved walking in the woods with Milo, picking flowers and forever keeping one eye open for Prince Charming. Oh and the job of private investigator I looked into appeared to be a bit mundane, mainly reading documents etc. Not quite as I pictured with me skiing down mountains with James Bond...

Necessary equipment...

Struggling to reach...

Rust2Rome number 21...

The flower I picked... 

Me, a Russian Spy...

On a low note my 'wedding' bouquet has become just a bunch of dead, shrivelled, dried up flowers now hanging in the airing cupboard haha. On a high note @SheWee  have contacted me and are sending me supplies for my rust2rome trip. I even get to choose which colour I would prefer. I've gone for pink. Apparently I have to practice using it in the shower. For the record there will be no photos of this activity.

For some reason, for the first time in my life, I've put on weight. All my life I've been one of those people that people hate, as in I can eat anything. Well that good fortune has ended. I was in a shop changing room, with my mum, trying on size eight dresses when she, kindly, suggested I try a size ten. At one point my mum was nipping back out to the shop floor and returning with size twelves. My mum thought this was hilarious given the fact that she has lost over three stone in weight recently. Maybe we can clothes swop. I consoled myself that I had a lovely pair of sucky in knickers at home that would surely help. No. I can't even pull them on! Heyho no more home baking cookies for me for a while.

Today I've decided to apply for a job that appeared in my email box. I've applied to be a Private Investigator. My reckoning is that I will be out there, obviously dressed like a Russian spy,  investigating adulteress marriages and that in turn could provide me with an abundance of available gentlemen. Hmm...

Me in disguise...

The failed wedding bouquet...

Previous culinary delights...

Current culinary delights...