I've not been myself of late. Just feeling a bit down and out of sorts. Not helped with hearing 'you're so lucky, you have nothing to worry about, you have sunshine, you live in an idyllic location' etc etc.
Kind of makes me feel worse and unallowed to feel this way. I do believe anyone can feel anxious at any point in their life. The millionaire worrying what size speedboat to buy. The beautiful lady up-keeping her looks. The holy man loosing his faith. We all wobble even when we seem to have it all. We are all, at some point, just holding it together on the inside and yet being perceived as sane! I think everyone in the world is just on the brink of madness. But I wouldn't have it any other way :)
So I've been doing lots of soul searching and trying to understand me. Not an easy task as I constantly change my mind or just shut down. Difficult talking to yourself when you don't want to talk about it lol. I have realised that I'm a person who likes solitude and always thought I should never admit it. But I am admitting it 'I like my own company' there I've said it! That's not to say I can't and won't be a party animal, I just know which I prefer.
I've now come up with a plan. I've discussed it with Milo and he is all for it. I'm going to rewrite my whole blog MiloandMe According To Milo. Every entry will be how Milo perceived the days events throughout our adventure. I'm really going to enjoy doing this and feel quite focused. Now all I need to do is find a suitable quiet, rural location to park up the Beast and hibernate for the winter and get writing. Anyone in the Uk with a spare field I can borrow? (preferably with electric socket!)...
MiloandMe have been on an adventure in our motorhome The Beast looking for love. Our quest began 2015 in Scotland where we came close to our happy ever after. 2016 our adventure took us touring the Coast of Ireland continuing our search. We then flew to Portugal and spent six months in the Big Beach house caring for Gran. 2017 we took the Beast to live in rural France looking for 'je ne sais quoi'. Now in the UK and publishing our book. Never give up on your dream...
Hi Nicci Im a wee bit behind as have also been out of kilter for about a month so havent read too much about your journey.Are you leaving and returning to uk
ReplyDeleteHi Maggie, I lost my mojo for a while there! I miss the UK, I miss me...! X
DeleteQuite easy to get confused. What seems like Heaven still needs a purpose. You are blessed with Milo. Are you still in possession of the beast?
ReplyDeleteMilo is my inspiration the Beast is my home Heaven is in my heart... :)
DeleteWhen you miss you, you recognise your vulnerability which is strength and courage. Finding yourself whether old or new self can be a wonderful adventure. Stay kind to yourself x
ReplyDeleteThank you, I like the sound of strength and courage :)
DeleteIf you fancy a bit of rural Wiltshire/Somerset you can park the Beast in my driveway for the winter. Milo would love Manny, my little pooch, and you would love the surrounding countryside. It really is beautiful down here just next door to Longleat. Country pubs, thatched cottages. Lord Bath wifelets everywhere, almost hippy Frome, lots of handsome army officers in Warminster, 20 miles east of Bath and 20 miles west of Salisbury, Glastonbury nearby.
ReplyDeleteSounds quite inviting Des :)
DeleteNothing wrong with liking your own company, I realised that was for me many years ago. Learn to embrace it. Just glad you are still all together and Milo is still with you.
ReplyDeleteAw thanks John :)
DeleteDelighted to see your long awaited blog Nicci.
ReplyDeleteThat sounds like a perfect plan
Hugs to Milo
Ann x
Thanks Ann, hugs to Tara xx
DeleteGreat to hear that Nicci.Not sure if my message is going
ReplyDeletex