I may yet become a gangster...

I'm so enjoying writing Milos version of our adventure. I've already written the first month of my blog. It appears Milo and I are quite alike, although my focus was finding the man of my dreams whereas Milos focus was and always is about food! Maybe that's why I'm still single, Milo doesn't want to share his food.  But at the same time I do believe he has always had my back.

I've had little feed back from my ad on gumtree. I did receive a request to provide a gentleman with a regular 'massage' stating he would be happy to visit my home. I don't think I'm quite ready to turn the Beast into a portable brothel just yet! I'm also sharing a page with a man advertising himself as a gangster, proclaiming never to have grassed in his life. Maybe I should contact him and suggest a Bonnie and Clyde setup.

My worst news this week was a gruesome tax demand from the inland revenue. I'd be most unhappy if I ended up in that Thai prison due to unpaid taxes, maybe I will contact Clyde...

Me and bestie being gangsters...

Advertising alongside gangsters...

Our next adventure will be, here...

Many years ago when my son was very small he went for a drive with my Dad. My Dad had stopped the car and my son asked him "what's wrong Gag?" My Dad replied "we're lost" to which my son replied "we're not lost Gag, we're here..." I love that little conversation. I love even more how my Dad, God rest his soul, proclaimed nobody could ever be lost again. I often feel lost and then I remind myself I'm here, and probably exactly where I should be at any given time.

It's also like when people get really angry or frustrated when they are stuck in traffic or not being served quick enough at the checkout. I like to think it's not a delay, it's a reason. Maybe I will miss a forthcoming car crash due to my delay. Or maybe I will bump into a long lost friend due to my holdup.

So that's my outlook on life for today haha! My glass isn't half empty my glass isn't half full my glass is always refillable! And now I just have to decide what to fill my glass with. Milo and me are returning to the UK on December 22nd, Christmas with my family and then figure out our next adventure...


Life is a long and winding road...

My best friend...

Where to next co pilot... 

Returning to the UK...

Funny how the smallest situation can change our whole personality momentarily. If I find myself in a restaurant I am a certain type of customer. I will always eat the tough steak so as not to delay my fellow diners by reordering. I will not call over the waiter and bother his busy schedule to refill my drink. I will not complain of the stained table cloth causing someone to get into trouble. I will do without extra mayonnaise so as not to seem demanding. But... If a small insect should land in my hair whilst dining... I become the customer from hell. I will scream hysterically, I will jump up and down, I will tear my own hair out. I will require every available member of staff to assist me in removing this creature from hell. I will demand a complete and constant inspection of my hair for fellow beasties. I will need reassurance throughout my meal that said creature is not still crawling through my roots. I must have plenty of hugs and understanding from my fellow diners and hear them repeat that 'no, I am not over reacting' 'I would be the same' 'your behaviour is perfectly rational'. Until I can return to my normal unassuming, quiet and mild mannered personality... Today's drama.

I am returning to the UK. Not because of above mentioned beasties! I do miss the UK and have done for a while now. Portugal has been good to me but it's not home. I don't quite know where home is other than I have had, my whole life, that feeling of wanting to go home. I've still got my Motorhome and I miss being in it. It's my own personal space. It's my safe place. And it's mine.

I've signed up with a house sitting website and am hoping some wonderful person will ask me to care for their rural home over the winter months, even if I just park up next to it and be a caretaker. Then Milo and Me will hibernate for the winter and I will write my book. And, if I don't win the lottery, burn twigs, eat pine cones and drink from a stream...!

I miss my Beast...

This could be why I am single...

This is the man I am searching for. I am happy to stay single if I can't find him :)

Physically

Tall or at least four inches taller than me. His eyes will be his main feature, they will draw me in with every look. His hair will be any colour but there will be enough of it to run my fingers through. Body hair is fine as long as not a carpet back. No tattoos would be good also no jewellery other than a watch, which he will always remove in bed. His body will not be skinny, his shoulders will be broad, his belly may have a small pot to match mine. His upper arms will be strong enough to lay my head on at night. His thighs will be that of a rugby player that will enable me to dead leg him with my elbow when he winds me up. His hands will be manly and clean, with a gentle touch. His bottom will be the cutest thing in my world, but not as cute as mine...

Personality

He will ooze confidence with an air of arrogance that he has earned. He will be intelligent and know words that have to be explained to me without making me feel stupid. He will have an organised mind but will be able to throw caution to the wind at a moments notice. A funny man who always gets the hidden joke. Warm and kind hearted but won't suffer fools gladly. He will know his strengths and yet recognise his weaknesses. He will be honest enough to admit another lady is beautiful but faithful enough not to stray. He will be able to read me like a book without revealing the end...

Status

His employment will be important to him. His salary will afford us a luxurious lifestyle but will not be the most important detail in our relationship. He will come from a large and loving family who will welcome me with open arms. He will have a wide and varied mixture of friends who will become my friends also...

Us

He will always be attracted to me and me him. We will always respect each other's space. We will love each other unconditionally. We will have a mutual trust but both will always have the insight of reasonable doubt. We will strive on a daily basis to work on our relationship without excluding the outside world. And most importantly, he will love Milo...

Fail to prepare, prepare to fail ;)...

I'll just sit here and wait...